Do you have any problems dating, seducing or approaching women?

Many smart, interesting and attractive guys say they run out of conversation and start to act weird when talking to girls they find really attractive. Interestingly these guys can effortlessly transfix and charm the pants of lots of girls they are not really that into.

Their real problem is that their subconscious mind knows they are not confident in their ability to pleasure a woman in the bedroom.

So they self-sabotage.

Every @#$%^& time

This is the pitiful story of the first 31 years of my life. Please don’t repeat my mistakes.

First find girls you can seduce and whose company you enjoy. Then learn to give them the best sex of their lives.

After that you can focus scoring on that 20 year old bi-sexual French-Swedish supermodel, Harvard PhD, pro tennis player, concert violinist, whose Dad is a billionaire film director and whose two passions in life are having threesomes with you and her supermodel model gal pals and the volunteer work she does with sick children and orphans in her spare time.

1. Put A Pillow Under Her Lower Back

“More pleasure for her. Way easier for you.”

If a woman is laying flat on her back and you are nervous, tired and your manhood not 100% filled with blood, it can be tricky to successfully enter her. Placing a pillow under the small of her back brings her “passage” to an angle that runs parallel to the bed. This makes it vastly easier to enter, even if you are only partially erect. Many women actually love the feeling of you getting harder and larger inside them as you thrust.

Also, most women will gain more pleasure from sex with their pelvis tilted at this angle.

This advice is for the advanced guys as well. I’m 40. It’s tough to come out with a raging boner after going for 3 straight hours, unless of course I’m already inside of her. As you know it’s much easier to grow in there!

I’ve had threesomes where I’ve topped the 5 hour mark–thanks to this one little trick! And, I would never have gotten over the extreme initial nervous energy with some of the great threesomes partners of my life, without this knowledge.

I think this is one of the great pieces of sex advice you’ll ever get.

It can be exceptionally tricky for a virgin or sexually inexperienced guy to deal with nervousness, condoms, logistics, getting her undressed, not knowing what to do and maintaining a decent erection without ejaculating. Believe me, I know. Using a pillow will make that crucial, first penetration much easier. I would have lost my virginity way earlier had someone shared this little nugget with me.

For sex go with a firm latex pillow. Feather or polyester fill pillows aren’t ideal as they will lose their shape over time. I personally invested $150 in a pillow designed especially for sex. Money very well spent.

2. Get The Lighting Right

“Bad lighting is the bedroom equivalent of bad breath.”

I’d guess more men have screwed up a “sure thing” because of poor lighting, than anything else (even with the girl already in the bedroom!).

This is so easy to fix, please don’t make the mistake I have many times.

Firstly, never try to sleep with a woman under fluorescent overhead lighting. It’s a near certain deal breaker. Actually, any overhead light won’t do you many favours–although if you have a dimmer you may get just away with it.

Candlelight is almost certainly the best, but for first time sex it can look like you’ve gone to a fair bit of trouble. It’s perhaps projecting a lot of sexual intent on a first date, possibly before she’s decided to go through with sleeping with you.

The best bet is usually a bedside lamp, or two, with a nice frosted bulb. Don’t be scared to discreetly dim the lights as things start to get hotter.

I traveled for many years and often had to “make do” with whatever the budget accommodation I was staying at could provide. Sometimes if things happen quickly the best you can do is turn off the lights in your room and let some light come in through a partially open door. I had sex for the first time with one of the hottest girls I’ve ever seen with the lights off and her small torch pointed to the ceiling.

Big tip: You can also turn a horrible study light into something romantic with the right scarf or a thin t-shirt. However, if you’re as absent-minded as me be sure to keep you’re sense of smell engaged and the number for the local fire department handy.

As rule of thumb a really attractive woman under 25 is generally going to want the place half as bright as you, in order to be comfortable. And that’s assuming she has a body she’d love to show off in a bikini and/or nice skin. For the majority of women you’d better go much darker if you’re looking for some action.

3. Save Most Of Your Physical Compliments For The Bedroom

“Flatter a beautiful woman when she needs it most”

Most guys give physical compliments to beautiful women when they want to talk to them, or ask them out on a date. But a really beautiful woman (who spent ages selecting her outfit and doing her hair and make-up) knows she’s beautiful. And she has heard it all before–often from boring “nice guys”. So you’re not advancing your agenda here a great deal.

With beautiful women, save most of your physical compliments for when she’s naked, particularly so the first time. It’s here she needs your encouragement and positive feedback the most. They need to know you like what you see and you are enjoying being with them. Most women will be frantically comparing what they’ve got against the countless, perfectly airbrushed, surgically enhanced images they constantly see (and know that you see!) in magazines, billboards and on TV.

I dated a professional model who admitted feeling extremely insecure when a guy she liked saw her naked for the first time. This is despite having a body that no team of plastic surgeons and personal trainers could do a thing to improve. She seriously thought that a guy might refuse to sleep with her because her body was not attractive enough. Inconceivable in her case. So, if a professional model thinks like this, what hope does a regular cute girl’s self-esteem have these days?

I personally recommend you throw genuine gushing praise on any women who look and feel great naked, but don’t necessarily have the super slim “model body” that is so coveted in the media today. I’d also lay it on thick with women who have nicely shaped, firm breasts that are of average or below average size.

A top male model friend of mine once commented that a girl I was dating had the 2nd best body he’d seen in his entire life. Her body was perfect, completely flawless, a 1 in 1,000. She also had absolutely perfect, large A or small B-cup breasts. But standing at 5’11 she looked fairly small-chested in any outfit that wasn’t completely figure-hugging. I can’t imagine how many times she would have heard, “that girl would have the best body on earth–if only she had slightly bigger tits!”.

Her breasts actually grew considerably during intercourse. I heaped praise on them, telling her how firm and perfect they were and how much they turned me on. Our sexual energy, her libido and sensuality skyrocketed. I think those were the sweetest words she’d ever heard spoken in English. I wrote a post about what I learnt from this Russian beauty. You can see a pic and read about her here–Lessons In Male Confidence.

Whatever your girl looks like, pick a couple of her assets and say some nice things about them during foreplay and in the throes of passion.