Dating this Russian girl taught me more about being a man with women than everything in the dating industry combined. Here is some of her advice for us wussy American, English and Canadian men:
“In Russia, a man who cannot come up to a strange girl and start talking to her is a loser. He is nothing. It does not matter how much money he has, his education, how clever, funny or handsome he is…
Why don’t your mothers and fathers sit down with their sons and teach them teach these things? It is so basic. I don’t understand how this could happen…
Do men in your culture realise they lose a lot in their ownlives not being confident, when they are unable to come up to a woman?
What woman wants a man who is scared of women?”
I got all this after hearing about three good looking, tall, athletic Australian and American guys that came up and started trying to talk to my new 5’11″ Russian girlfriend, as she lay beside the pool in her bikini reading.
All 3 came up, visibly nervous. One asked if he could sit down on the lounger beside her. She asked “why?” and he nearly choked in fear. All 3 guys hopped straight onto the clichéd question train; “Where are you from”, “Oh I bet you like Vodka?”, “What do you think of communism?” None introduced themselves by name, shook her hand or asked much about her. They were all cautiously testing the water for acceptance and approval.
Beautiful Russian girl in swimsuit not like nervous mans and quickly shoo them away. “I wish to read my book now. You have nice day.” Translation: Go away you pathetic, wussy man.
She is a 5’11” classical trained ballerina who is highly educated, well-traveled, and well-read. She is from a wealthy family, both parents have Ph.Ds. Her father is ex-KGB, a former champion boxer and sounds like the veritable Russian Superman.
She presents as the typical Russian Ice Queen, complete with impeccable posture and shorts barely wider than my belt. They leave an inch or two of Russia’s finest ass for public viewing, atop legs that raise motor vehicle insurance premiums wherever she goes. I can count on one hand the number of bodies I’ve seen in my life like that.
She’s not the warmest person in the presence of any strangers. She will rarely laugh or even smile much around people she does not know; “Yes, I am considered bitch, even in Russia”.
She has some strong opinions on men and women. She taught me more about “being a man” than everything in the dating industry combined.
1. “All women want a CONFIDENT man. That is genuine strength and certainty from their inner core. This is the NUMBER 1 most important attribute in an attractive man. If you don’t have confidence, all the other stuff put together doesn’t really matter to a woman
2. “A man must make decisions and follow through, this wishy-washy indecisive thing not attractive at all.”
3. “You must be in control, be in charge, if you can’t take care of yourself, how can you look after you and me? I want to feel safe, that I can be weak and vulnerable with a man and he that he will protect me like my father did when I was little girl. That is man I want. This is man I give my trust, my heart my body and soul.”
4. If a girl says to you, “You remind me of my father,” and she likes her father, this is about the strongest indicator of interest you can get. Check you’ve brushed your teeth, your room is clean and you’ve got condoms ready. You’re in big-time buster!
5. Take the lead, always have a plan for the two of you. DON’T leave it up to her and for heaven’s sake do not ask her, “So what would you like to do?” on an early date. Take charge but consider her, maybe offer her some choices, for your day, for your holiday, for your first date.
6. If you are talking to other women in her presence, particularly attractive women, take her hand or put your arm around her. You can talk all you want, even flirt with and compliment the other women because she now feels protected and safe. This will make her feel like a princess.
7. Take her hand when you are walking together, moving or changing direction.
8. Hold her hand or put your arm around her often when you are together in public.
9. Always walk on the street side, protecting her from the road and cars. I have got this advice from the very finest women I have dated.
These sort of differences are how the most beautiful and desirable of women sift through the masses of handsome, successful, confident and desirable men who constantly pursue them.
It is guys who get these little 1% things that wake up in the morning to find that sweet, naked runway model curled around them with love and a suggestive twinkle in her magnificent eyes. I don’t know of any sports car or boat that will compare, sorry.
10. Women hate men who have to ask. Women are massively attracted to a guy who just intuitively knows what she wants. Don’t ask; just do it, especially behind closed doors boys. Note this takes experience and practice, but sweet, genuine women are generally very forgiving and eager to help you learn to be a “man” in their eyes.
11. Check with your girl, but if I wake and go to the bathroom at night, the correct thing to do when I return is to very gently put my arms around her or pull her over to my chest. It does not matter that much if I wake her, she will drift back to sleep quickly feeling cared for, loved and protected by a man. She will then see to it that my morning is most enjoyable!
When I learnt to carefully avoid her many prickles (female tests mostly) and to always act like a man, my brilliant Russian bikini girl became an angel. She turned into a sweet, soft, sensual and brilliant woman, one of the five most wonderful women I have dated in my life (that’s her in the photo in the white bikini!). I don’t think I’ve laughed so much or so hard with anyone.
After battling to be “man” enough for my new Russian girlfriend over a number of weeks, I am finding I am far more confident, masculine and attractive around the 3.5 billion less difficult and demanding women of the world.